my life: a reimagining.

lately there has been a huge amount of stress in my life. none of it was necessary, but it was something that had to be dealt with. it was tough, left me pulling out my hair trying to find a solution to problems that i had absolutely no control over. then it hit me: i have absolutely no control over it. i need to do whatever it is i need to do to make myself happy, and do what IS within my control to help my friends along. because no matter how stressed out they make me i will always love them and therefore always ALWAYS be there for them to the best of my ability. The past two days have been blissful for my poor little brain. taking a step back from things has made me completely at peace. i'm getting along with everyone as far as i know, and i was even smiling in the middle of a lecture today. for no reason. just because i felt like smiling. i feel like its a good look for me. another big change in my life: i have all of these lovely friends in my life that i rarely see anymore. i need to reach out to them and go spend time reveling in just how awesome and funny and great they all are. so thats what i'm going to do. i'm going to go out and enjoy myself and not feel like i'm leaving someone out just because i'm getting to know someone new. aside from the insane amount of my life that must be dedicated to studying, i would love to quite the lazy attitude and just get out and get to know people...because i LOVE people, but i've gotten to where they intimidate me. thats not a place that an extrovert should be. this will change. soon.